Sacrifice

When I became an army wife I knew that I was going to have to make multiple sacrifices. For instance: being able to choose where I want to live, potentially never being able to have a stable career, time with my husband when he is deployed or in the field. I knew all these things when I said "I do", heck, I knew them when I said yes to his proposal.

Some days are harder than others though. I consider myself a pretty strong minded independent person and I hate relinquishing control over any aspect of my life to anyone. It is hard to say, "Ok, tell me what to do next and I'll do anything you say." In fact, saying that is damn near impossible for me. I want to have a say, I want to have a vote, and more importantly I just want to be heard.

That is not a reality when you are married to someone in the military. You lose your vote on all the things you once held as sacred and all you are left with is how you will handle the situation. Will you handle it with grace and dignity? Will you become angry and bitter? Will you become the army wife that most civilians think of - the cheating rotten human being who does not care about the sacrifice their spouse is making for them and their country?

I want so bad to be able to handle all this with grace and dignity. I am beginning to realize that at times it is absolutely necessary to put it in the hands of God and trust that he will take care of me and my family. When you are somewhat of a control-freak...that can be a major challenge. Please be patient with me while I struggle to become worthy of the challenge.