Saturday, July 28, 2012

Holidays

I have been saying for awhile now..."Every day is a Holiday in Toddlerland".  That is because the days are always the same, we get up between 6:30 and 7 - well honestly Toddler D probably gets up earlier than that but it takes awhile before she wakes me up. We play, have breakfast, do some kind of morning activity or errands (I like to do my errands in the mornings), lunch, nap, play, dinner, bed time.  Thrown in there is medicine twice a day for me and three times a day for her. The only variation in our day to day lives is the errands and weather. Weather is obviously a huge determining factor in what we can do on any given day and living in WA we get a lot of weather.

There just isn't much variety, don't get me wrong, we do go and do different things. This month alone we have gone berry picking, to a carnival, out for cupcakes, to the library for the first time, we go to the fabric store and the farmer's market (once a week each). We also go to gym 3 days a week.  But in the grand scheme of things every day is virtually the same. Me wracking my brain on how to keep her entertained and how to be engaging (because even on my worst days she deserves that!), and her exploring, learning and doing.  There is no such thing as a weekend or sleeping in.  Toddler D doesn't know how to sleep in and probably wouldn't want to anyways, it would cut into her being awake time and she lives for her awake and playing time! 

The days have started to run together and we are only 85 days into this deployment. That sometimes has me worried, especially in light of the fact that our travel plans for our next trip to California were completely destroyed this week. It is not easy to keep up this pace, when you consider that I am not sleeping well, I am stressed, I am in pain and I am a bit scared. Not about the deployment (though it is near the top of my list) but about the new medications I am starting. I am worried that Toddler D won't be getting everything she deserves. I hate feeling like I might fail or let her down in some way. It is one of the most terrible feelings a parent can have.  I am just hoping that I can keep up my stamina and be the parent she deserves.

With gym ending on Monday and not starting back up again until September I now need to wrack my brains to find new ways to get us out of the house during the week, because it would be so easy to become home bodies and that wouldn't be good for either Toddler D or myself. I am open to suggestions people, but just remember I also live on a budget so going to the zoo every other day is not economical for us!

Sunday, July 08, 2012

66

In 66 days I have:
  • Kissed boo boos
  • Sang someone to sleep 132 times
  • Made 198 meals
  • Cried myself to sleep at least 15 different times
  • Prayed constantly
  • Gone to 4 doctors appointment for my baby girl and 2 for myself
  • Administered medication to my baby 968 times
  • Finished 2 quilts
  • Made 50 quilt blocks
  • Said good bye on the phone too many times
  • Played at the park
  • Gone to Kindergym and the Farmers Market
  • Played Games
  • Built with legos
  • Painted Pictures
  • Read books
  • Done puzzles
  • And So Much More...
Life goes on, I don't always want it to, but it does.  It is not the same though, it is different. Almost a shadow of how life is supposed to be, but on it goes.  Never stopping, we move forward, waiting, waiting for the day that we pick him up, the day he sleeps under our roof again, the day that instead of praying for his safety we are saying a prayer of Thanksgiving for his return.  Life goes on, like it has these past 66 days and will go one for many more days to come.