Twenty Minutes

Did you know that is only 1200 seconds? Not very long in the big scheme of things. In one day there are 1440 minutes or 86,400 seconds. When you look at it that way 1200 seconds just doesn't seem like much time at all. Well, let me tell you, it's not.

Twenty minutes is barely enough time to talk about all the cute and adorable things Toddler D does in 24 hours, let alone talk about much else. I think that is one of the hardest things about deployments. Not being able to talk, not having that person to bare your soul to as often as you need. As parents, the first thing we talk about is our daughter, what she is doing, how she is handling things, how we should handle certain things. The next thing we talk about is how SSG D is doing, because I need to know that. I need to know that he is ok, that he is sleeping, that he is finding some time to just relax for 5 seconds a day and read a book or watch an episode of Babylon 5. These things are important to me, really important to me. It gives me hope for a sense of normalcy at the end of these 9 long months.  That leaves about 3 minutes for anything else, the "I love you's" and the "I miss you's".  Not much time. 

I miss him coming home and eating a meal with us, and going our high low (you may know this as the Rose and the Thorn). I miss that stuff, now don't get me wrong, Toddler D and I are doing those things with my parents, but it is just not the same. I miss him being there, I miss is dry sense of humor, I miss him picking up every toy in the living room before he can sit down for dinner (yes, OCD is a killer, but on the upside, my house is always clean). I miss him, and 20 minutes is not enough time to convey just how much I miss him.

I have started working on my first care package to him. Care packages are funny because you never know if what you are sending is going to be well-received or not. I mean I know he appreciates what we send him, but does he actually use them or like them. I always try to send dark chocolate, he is a choco-aholic after all. I always send him something to read - this time I will be sending two magazines and a book that didn't fit in his bag. The fun part is trying to send him some silly little toys that will make him smile. Last deployment I sent him a whoopie cushion, parachute men, and 3 cans of silly string. All big hits.  I have already hit the local toy shop and come up with a few little fun things to put in there. I am just hoping that each care package elaborates on all that I can't say in 20 minutes.

I live for those 20 minutes, they are just about the only thing that makes deployments bearable. I have to say that I just do not know how women did it during WWII, Korea, Vietnam, Desert Storm, etc. We are so lucky to get even the 20 minutes we get, and yet it will also never be enough. Funny how that works.

1200 seconds.